Not just repurposing, but BEING repurposed......" if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation: the old has gone, the new has come." ~~ 2 Corinthians 5:17

Friday, July 24, 2009

Me? A Public Speaker? .....You Bet Your Sweet @#$%^&* I Am.

Okay. So I mentioned this briefly in an earlier post, but I had a nice treat in March when I was featured front page of Grand Rapids Press' Sunday Home & Garden section. Jennifer Ackerman-Haywood did a great piece and I'm very grateful for that. But to be honest, I was very nervous about it. I mean I was REALLY nervous. I knew I had to do it, but I wasn't sure what to expect from the article.
Click this link to view the GR Press article.

It turned out to be a really good thing. And one result of that article was that I was asked to be the guest presenter for the Hudsonville Fair's Ladies' Day. Now that is something I'm very excited about! I know, I know. Most people would be excited about a newspaper article but nervous about public speaking. But if I ever was scared about public speaking, I was cured after an incident in my college days:

While taking an Anatomy and Physiology class, I spent a lot of time pouring through the pages of my textbook. Though not particularly good at science, I was fascinated with what I was reading (God has designed some awesome machinery ) and was acing the course. As a matter of fact, I was setting the curve with my closest peer earning a mere B. It didn't take long for the others to catch on and to begin giving me "looks". I don't know which was worse, the looks of contempt for messing up the curve or the looks of ridicule for being such a dork. I wanted to shout to them "I'm not a dork, I don't even like science!" (but we all know that would only have been half true).

ANYWAY, we were given the assignment of presenting an oral report on a medical condition chosen from the prof's list. As I waited my turn, I heard a lot of "Oh, I chose diabetes because my aunt has that" or "my neighbor has scoliosis so I picked that", etc. As luck would have it, I was the last one randomly chosen to come forward. There were only 3 left, none of which I had ever heard of before. Naturally, I picked the one with the funniest sounding name.

We were given plenty of time to complete the assignment, but as usual, being the procrasinator that I am, I waited until just before it was due to begin. I was home for the weekend and pulled out the trusty World Book and to my horrors discovered that it is a disease of the male genitalia. There was NO WAY I could give that report! But I couldn't go to my prof and let on that I waited until the last to do it. Or should I just drop the class!?

I was sick to my stomach. But decided I HAD to do it. And I had to say some of those words that I had never even verbalized before. Hey, doctors did it all the time! (What if I had decided to be a doctor, I reasoned.) Writing the report was no biggie. But now I had to figure out how I could possibly say THOSE words OUT LOUD. Back at school, I began "Operation Word Desensitization" by practicing on some of the guys in my dorm. "How's your @#$%^&* , Joe?". "Nice @#$%^&* we're having today, Mike." "Did you guys have some of that delicious
@#$%^&* for lunch today?" Oh, sure, I got some looks, but I was ready!

When the time of my report finally came, I walked confidently up to the front of my classroom. I launched into my report, spouting out @#$%^&* here and @#$%^&* there as needed, without even flinching. Out of the corners of my eyes I could see my peers -- including cute college guys -- giving each other knowing looks and snickering. But I made it through. And when I was done, I looked them all in the eye and announced that when I chose that particular malady, I had NO idea what it was. And that had I known, I NEVER would have chosen it. At that, the class dared to all burst out laughining and I saw a big grin break out across my professor's face.

So THAT'S why I no longer have a fear of public speaking and am excited to share my junk passion at this year's Hudsonville Fair. Me? A public speaker?.....You Bet Your Sweet
@#$%^&* I am!

Oh, you wanted to know how I did on my report?.............I got an A.



Artsy Fartsy Junkin Finds said...

Ypu are cracking me up here with your title!!! And I love your Just Junk there in the next post, hope all is well, thanks for giving me a giggle! Tootles, Janna

red.neck chic said...

I am laughing so hard over here!!! Thank You for the morning dose of YOU! CONGRATULATIONS on your article again - and CONGRATULATIONS on being a guest speaker!!! How fun and exciting!!!

Jill said...

Great story! Looking forward to hear how the speaking engagement goes. Are you going to start off with the genitalia story? You know, as an ice breaker?!